today was the beginning

today i started my new semester. today i got ready. today i was nice to people i didn't know. today i went to a basketball game. and today i even already read most of a chapter for my psychology class. tonight he didn't say goodnight, the only communication that he has been allowing, and tonight i deleted everything i ever said to him including pictures on stupid facebook. why? well here is the thing, i feel that i am being let go, and to be let go, you must also let go. i don't want to be that girl that continues to go back and look at things that used to be. i want to pretend like it never happened and someday it will feel like it never did. so here i type on this blog because i can't sleep until he says goodnight.... it's going to be a long one. but i am resiliant. i am strong. and i am not scared to be alone. i know that this is happening for a reason, and i know that there are things i will learn from this. i will only be made better through this situation. and someday, i might be able to find someone that will push away my fears of never being loved equally, and i will be blessed and happy. or i might never get married in this life and that too would be alright. i am trying and that in itself is something.